Disclaimers: Pokemon is owned by Nintendo, Game Freak, Creatures, etc... and I don't own Triscuits either. Rose Rochester, Rocket City, and the Rocket City Gym are all property of me, Sforzie.
Notes: Um, this is silly. I started it back in January, but never finished it. But now I have! It's part of the whole Primary Colors slant, but is written in a script style... It's somewhat strange, but oh well... Enjoy!

P.S.A.
(Public Service Announcement)
By: Sforzie

((Setting Notes: The year is about 2024 or so. Like, around the end of Primary Colors, but a year or two later? Yeah. The place is James' office in the Rocket City official government building--whatever it's called.))

(James is sitting on a desk, wearing a suit, minus the jacket. Think "Holy Matrimony!" but more relaxed. And black pants. James looks older, more..uh.. mature. Yeah. Having three kids will do that to you. So will being the mayor of a city of miscreants like Rocket City.)

JAMES: Hey!

(Uh.. Anyhow, thanks to his hair color the grey hairs are harder to see.)

JAMES: I don't have grey hairs! I'm only 45!

UNSEEN VOICE: Uh, 46, sir.

JAMES: Shut up!

(Ahem! Anyhow, James is still cute for being so... mature.)

JAMES: That's better.

(James is facing a camera, and so the way you're reading the story is kinda like you're watching it on TV. At least imagine it like that. It's funnier that way.)

VOICE: Ten seconds, sir.

JAMES: I hope the teleprompter works.

VOICE: 4..3..2...

**A PUBLIC SERVICE ANNOUNCEMENT FROM THE MAYOR**

JAMES: Good evening, citizens of Rocket City. The past year has been a productive one for Rocket City. Last month, the voters agreed to a new city ordinance that states that I, James Rochester the Mayor, must once a quarter do a public service announcement. With these annoucements, the local government hopes to better the people.

Today, with the help of people from around our community, I will be discussing Marriage.

(James picks up a picture off of the desk.)

JAMES: As many of you might know from her work around town, this is my lovely wife Jessie. Yes, after being married for..uh.. (looks blank for a moment) 21 years, I'm still in love with her. Even if she has gotten a few grey hairs.

JESSIE'S OFFSCREEN VOICE: Yeah, and like you haven't!

JAMES: (quietly) At least I don't have to dye mine!

JESSIE O-V: (growling)

JAMES: But long before I met Jessie, which was a really really long time ago, I didn't think I wanted to get married. And that's because I'm a guy.

(A triscuit goes flying and hits James upside the head. He brushes it aside and tries to maintain his composure.)

JAMES: Guys aren't interested in marriage, because marriage is something that women made up. If a man gets married, he loses his freedom. Sure, he gets the joy of being married to a gal with a beautiful figure and..er.. winning personality, but eventually her butt starts getting bigger, and she quits wanting to have sex with you.

JESSIE O-V: (growling) Jaaaames...

JAMES: And face it guys, without sex men go crazy. That's why our freedom is so important. Why do you think countries that let their rulers have harems were so much richer than countries that only allow you to marry one person at a time? Think of the great animes out there. The guys always get laid a lot in anime, so why can't I?!

(Jessie comes storming out. She is wearing her still red hair in a nice bun, and is wearing a dark red dress over dark grey hose. Despite James' butt comment, she's still pretty hot. Any guy in Rocket City would gladly take the mayor's place.)

JESSIE: Who's side are you on?!

(Ur... Jessie grabs James by the collar and starts shaking him.)

JAMES: Ow! Jessie, Jessie! Stop! I'm sorry!

(She keeps shaking him.)

JESSIE: And what are you sorry for?

JAMES: (Considers) Complaining about the sex.

JESSIE: If you don't quit complaining about it, I'm gonna make sure that you never have sex again!

JAMES: (Gulps) Yes dear.

(Jessie storms back off camera.)

JAMES: Fat ass.

(The box of triscuits hits him in the head.)

JAMES: Oww!

JESSIE O-V: Quit talking about my butt!

JAMES: I wasn't talking about your butt, I was talking about your ass!

OTHER VOICE: Sir! Sir!

JAMES: Huh? What?

(There is motioning offscreen that James watches.)

JAMES: Oh! We're still filming. My bad.

(James clears his throat, then smooths his hair and shirt.)

JAMES: As I was saying, marriage is a thing that chicks made up. It is the man's job to play along like he's enjoying it, and to make his wife happy.

JESSIE O-V: And you're saying you're not happy?!

JAMES: I didn't say that! Of course I'm happy!

JESSIE O-V: Then quit digging yourself into a deeper hole.

JAMES: But I'm just reading off the teleprompter.

JESSIE O-V: Really?

(Jessie stomps into view, right up to the camera.)

JESSIE: (reading) 'And everyone knows that men are happiest when they're doing things that keep their wives from being bitchy.' Who wrote this crap?

JAMES: Um, Jessie, you're giving Rocket City a really good chest shot right now.

OTHER VOICE: And outlying areas.

JAMES: Of what, Jessie or the city?

VOICE: Umm..

JESSIE: I don't care! Would you rather that the camera be on my butt?

JAMES: That's what camera 2 is for.

JESSIE: (growls)

OTHER VOICE: Our ratings did just go up a lot though.

JAMES: We have ratings?

OTHER VOICE: A lot of people switched to "Cooking with Chu" when you started this public service announcement.

JAMES: Oh. Switch to camera 2!

JESSIE: James!

(The camera switches to camera 2, which has a really good shot at Jessie's butt. She turns around, stomps to the camera, and decks the camera man. The camera switches back to camera 1.)

JAMES: Can I just finish my P.S.A.?

JESSIE: No! If I let you continue, you'll just keep talking like a typical little male pig!

JAMES: I'm not little!

JESSIE: I knoooow that.

(A Raichu has wandered on camera behind James, and is eating the triscuits.)

JAMES: Great, who let Rose's Raichu in here?

RAICHU: Rai-chu.

(Raichu continues eating.)

JESSIE: Shouldn't you be battling or something?

RAICHU: (shakes head) Chu.

ROSE's VOICE: It's his day off.

JESSIE: Well, shouldn't you be battling?

ROSE O-V: Um. It's my day off too.

JESSIE: Then what are you doing?!

ROSE O-V: I'm watching you beat up Daddy.

JAMES: You're not helping, Rose!

ROSE O-V: I don't have to. This is just more for me to tell my therapist later.

JAMES: Why does she get a therapist? Are we paying for it?

JESSIE: I don't know!

(Jessie sits next to James, blocking the view of Raichu.)

RAICHU: Chu-chu!

(Rose giggles.)

JESSIE: What? What did he say?

ROSE O-V: Something about your butt.

JESSIE: You stupid rat!

(Jessie knocks Raichu off the desk.)

JAMES: Rose, why are you here?

ROSE O-V: I think it had something to do with sex.

JAMES: What?! You're not old enough to have sex!

ROSE O-V: No, I was referring to you two.

JAMES: Oh.

ROSE O-V: Actually, Alex and Jim sent me here to grub money from you.

JAMES: What for?

ROSE O-V: Pizza.

JAMES: Why do you guys get pizza? I want pizza!

ROSE O-V: We'll save you some.

(Jessie gets James' wallet.)

ROSE O-V: You guys are really setting a good example for the city.

JESSIE: I married him! I'll put my hands in his pants if I want to!

JAMES: There's a first.

(Jessie hands some money offscreen to Rose.)

ROSE O-V: Thanks. Come on Raichu, time for pizza!

RAICHU O-V: Chuu!

JAMES: Get off the camera, Raichu!

(Raichu's face, upside down, appears onscreen.)

RAICHU: Raichu! Rai!

JAMES: Raichu!

ROSE O-V: I think he's trying to pick up chicks.

RAICHU: Chu!

(Raichu waves, then jumps off the camera and scampers away.)

JAMES: This is crazy. Here I am, trying to be the mayor, and you guys keep butting in.

JESSIE: Quit talking about my butt!

(James sighs.)

VOICE: Sir, you're out of time.

JAMES: What? But I didn't get to finish talking!

VOICE: Sorry, sir.

JAMES: Well. Fine! Just cut me off, see I if--

**This has been a Public Service Announcement from the Mayor. Please join us again next quarter when the Mayor discusses how to do laundry. Thank you.**

End, already!